Maap, masih belum mood ngeblog seperti dulu lagi… Untuk sementara waktu buat menjaga blog tetap hidup, biar gw selipkan hasil-hasil ‘nguping’ gw yang baru. Maaf buat yang masih sering berkunjung karena gw nggak aktif lagi dalam dunia per-blog-an :[ Now, proudly presents… another nguping session.

Ibu2 di gramed GI: "mas, tolong dicek dong, harganya gak salah ya? sembilan ratus ribu? hah? bener? OH MY GODDD MAHAL BANGETTT!! gak jadi beli ah, mas, mahal!"

Pembicara: "kamu bisa pintar begitu matematika-nya belajar dari mana?"
Temen gw: "kehidupan."

Guru agama: "Jadi, orang itu tuh sombong sekali. Dulu, ia pernah berkata: ‘tidak akan ada yang bisa membunuh saya, kecuali ada peluru menembus kepala saya’."
Temen gw: "Kalo gitu kita bazooka aja, pak."

Guru biologi: "The molecular formula of sea water is… C H2O."
(Buat yang gak ngerti: H2O itu water. C itu kan dibacanya ’si’. Jadi, dibacanya ’sea water’.)

Temen gw, sekelompok dalam eksperimen tentang jamur pada roti: "Okei, kita harus berdoa biar jamurnya makin banyak. Amin, moga2 sukses"

Temen gw, pada pelajaran membuat simile: "My scissors is like me… I cut other people’s feelings."

gw: *kasih liat foto temen gw* gimana?
yamiza : mau yang kasar atau yang halus chelle?
gw : terserah, toh itu bukan gw hahaha
yamiza : yaaa mo yang mana dulu
gw : halus dulu deh.
yamiza : mukanya agak…. kurang menarik.
gw : okeh. kasarnya?
yamiza : mukanya JELEK.

Temen gw waktu retret: "Eh, kita dinner dulu baru makan, ya!"

"Eh, kalo hape lu kita sentil trus jatoh dari eskalator gmn yah?"
"…Lu bakal nyusul."

sodara #1: "idih, ud sweet 17 tapi handuknya masi gambar pikachu!"
sodara #2: "salah! itu handuk buat cuci kaki gw. kalo handuk mandi gw itu sebenernya Barbie sama Hello Kitty."
(setting: ultah sweet 17 di kamar sodara #2)

"gw minta temen gw bacain no telp salah satu anggota kelompok drama.
dia salah baca nomor karena fotokopi jarkomnya burem. 55 jadi 66
org yang salah itu SMS gue
"S!aPa siCh?"
keringet gw langsung netes."
-kesaksian yamiza

Temen gw : "Oh, tugasnya tentang Love, Sex, and Dating ya? Well… Gw ga mau nulis tentang dating, ga mau tentang love, ga mau tentang dating!"

Guru gw: Jadi tuh, pas besoknya ibu liat kucingnya udah mati, kasihan banget…
Temen gw: Kucingnya stroke kali, bu.

Nggak terlalu banyak, tapi sekian dulu untuk kali ini Semoga terhibur!

Hannah Skye will no longer be here.

I stood in front of my room, holding a packed suitcase with one hand and a smaller handbag on the other hand. The room, used to be a total mess with unorganized stacks of papers here and there, now only had a bed, table, and chair. The most valuable things in my room are in my bags now, and the rest of the furniture I’ve thrown away. It was quite hard to get rid of things without their notice, especially ones like statues or wardrobes. At first I planned on selling them all or giving them to the poor – but it’s just too troublesome. Finally, with the help of an axe and fire, those items are history.

It was midnight, and the house was real quiet and dark. I paid attention carefully for every single sound – if I hear any footsteps or creaking sound of a door being opened, I’ll immediately dart back into my room and lock the door. I won’t risk being busted by them, or else I might lose my own freedom. I’ve planned this escape thoroughly, and I won’t let it to be delayed anymore.

The house was still silent, as if respecting my room and me to spend our last moments together. I touched the walls gently, remembering the times when mother and I painted them with colorful patterns and pictures. We both got scolded by grandpa and he ordered them to be painted back to white, but I had lots of fun.

A rush of memories flooded my brain. Picture of mother and I sleeping on the bed as her soft voice reads a story for me, picture of me who fell asleep in her arms, picture of Bruce and me watching the stars together… When the flash of pictures in my mind ended, tears began to dwell on my eyes and my heart began to ache. Can I stand leaving them? Can I survive living on my own?

No. I should not doubt anymore.

I turned to the room across mine, and opened the door. Tiptoeing in the darkness, I reached for the lady sleeping on the bed. She was asleep, of course, since she must be so tired after work. I stroked her face lightly, and kissed her cheek.

“I love you, mom.”

I stood up and rushed outside. I felt like I heard a sobbing sound, but I don’t want to turn back to check. I’ve already made up my mind, and I mustn’t hold back now. Stepping down the stairs, my heart raced, and finally I opened the main door.

The taxi I rented was waiting in a park not far from here. I must not keep that poor guy waiting. Before I sneaked out from the secret path I’ve prepared since months ago - a hole in the wall covered with bushes and flowers, I took the house’s key out of my pocket and threw it away into the pond.

It’s time for me to leave this place, and there’s no returning back.

“Hello,” I smiled to the man who was smoking and leaning to the lamppost next to his taxi. He seemed bored. Maybe I made him waiting for too long.

 “Sorry to keep you waiting. I guess we can go now,” I said.

“No problem,” the driver laughed, threw away his cigarette and opened the car’s door for me – ah, what a gentleman! I put my luggage next to me and made myself comfortable, since it’ll be a long journey. And maybe, I won’t be so lucky to have another ride in a taxi. Just maybe.

“Where are you going, Miss-?” he turned and wondered for a name, since I remained anonymous when requesting for the taxi on the phone. Not to mention the taxi company is far from the house and not really famous. Of course, he must be suspicious of what I’m up to. I decided not to be so mysterious, or else he’ll find me too memorable and they’ll easily find out my whereabouts.

“My name is… Hayley. Hayley Starr,” I raised my head and looked him in the eye, “And just go as far as you can from the city, I’ll tell you later when to stop.”

He looked back at me, waiting for me to say something more. He was doubtful, but I didn’t turn my eyes away to tell him I’m sure of what I’m doing. “All right,” he finally said and started the car, “But don’t make me go travel around the whole country and ended up saying you forget your wallet.”

I smiled sweetly again and showed him my wallet. He smiled back, more relaxed now that he knew I’m a paying customer. I rested my head back and closed my eyes. It seemed I had a nice companion for the beginning of my journey.

As the car moved away, I couldn’t help but to turn back and take a last view of the grand house. I caught a glimpse of a woman standing behind the window at the top floor, but the trees covered the way before I could get a better look. The house grew smaller and finally faded away behind the trees. I finally broke down and cried. I covered my face with my hands and my long hair so no one else can see.

Mr.Jefferson, the name of the driver as I saw on his tag, must have thought that I’m sleeping. He began to smoke again and switched the radio programme to the one talking about stuffs I don’t want to hear about. From the corner of my eye I also caught a glimpse of his hand holding a beer bottle. How disgusting.

   Pada tau website Nguping Jakarta? Itu adalah sebuah blog yang berisi percakapan-percakapan yang lucu bin ajaib yang di-"nguping"-in oleh orang-orang Jakarta dan dipost kesana. Inspirasinya dapet dari Overheard in New York.

   Kalau kita mau memperhatikan, sebenernya di sekeliling kita itu sering ada kejadian dan percakapan konyol lho! It’s just because we’re not listening well… Why don’t we tune down our talking for awhile and start listening to our surroundings? Bukannya disuruh nguping pembicaraan pribadi orang lho! Kadang-kadang dengan nggak sengaja denger orang ngobrol kita bisa tau hal-hal baru. Nggak cuma sama strangers, tapi juga sama orang dekat kita. Terkadang kita terlalu sering bicara sampai nggak nyadar kalau orang terdekat kita punya sesuatu yang ingin diperdengarkan pada kita.

   So, listening is important, guys! Itulah sebabnya kita punya dua telinga dan bukan dua mulut (alasan lain, coba bayangkan kalau kita punya dua mulut dan satu telinga… gimana yah tampangnya? )

***

Berikut beberapa hasil "nguping"nya Chelle:

"Jadi gw dikasih soal, kira2 kayak gini: ada orang nyari kaos kaki di tengah kegelapan, berapa kemungkinan dia bakal ngambil 1 pasang kaos kaki coklat dan 1 pasang kaos kaki putih kalau ada x kaos kaki disana… mnurut gw, knapa gak dinyalain aja lampunya biar keliatan semua kaos kakinya?"

"Teori continental drift dan plate tectonic yang saya ajarkan berlaku hari ini ha2" (guru bio gw, pada hari terjadi gempa di Jakarta)

"Waktu gw dimarahin, tu orang tuh gak ada senyum-senyumnya! Kalo lu gitu kan ngomelin gw masih ada senyum-senyumnya…" (seorang mbak-mbak di restoran, lagi curhat sama temennya dengan penuh emosi)

N: Eh, lu tadi waktu buat kerangka esai B.Ind topiknya tentang apa?
L: Oh, gw bikin tentang konsep sopan menurut orang-orang yang…
J: *syok* Apa?! L, lu ikut padus jadi suara sopran?!
L: …Hah?

"Karyawan: Selamat, bapak telah mendapatkan kesempatan meminjam uang dari bank kami dengan tarif bunga spesial! Ini kesempatan langka pak, apa bapak berminat?
Bapak-bapak: Hmm, nggak deh, makasih ya. *males*
Karyawan: Kenapa pak?! Jarang lho orang yang dapat kesempatan ini! Biasanya mereka harus daftar dulu berbulan-bulan…
Bapak-bapak: Er… Soalnya saya lagi banyak duit!"

"WAHH!! Warna ny bagus banget!! Pasti pensil warna nya berkualitas… Ama yg punya pasti keren bgt wkwk"
(perhatian: yang ngomong adalah sang pemilik pensil warnanya sendiri. gambar yang dilihat adalah hasil pewarnaan menggunakan pensil warna yang dipinjam darinya.)

"A: eh, kotoran kambing itu warna apa sih?
B: coklat, kan?
A: Kenapa? Dia kan makan rumput, harusnya ijo dong?"
B: soalnya kan di lambung kambing klorofilnya dicerna gitu…
A: oooh, gitu toh…"
(Di lift)

Hmm, kalo kalian sendiri gimana? Pernah "nguping" omongan aneh gak?

(udah lama nggak post, sekali post kok aneh? hahaha… maaf, lagi nggak ada mood nulis, jadi iseng aja xP bukunya sebenernya ada ilustrasinya yang lebih mengena )

The Giving Tree, by Shel Silverstein

Once, there was a tree, and she loved a little boy.

And every day the boy would come, and he would gather her leaves, make them into crowns and play the king of the forest. He would climb up her trunk and swing from her branches, and eat apples. And they would play hide-and-go-seek. And when he was tired, he’ll sleep in her shade.

And the boy loved the tree. Very much.

And the tree was happy.

But time went by, and the boy grew older. And the tree was often alone.

Then one day the boy came to the tree and the tree said, "Come, Boy, come and climb up my trunk and swing from my branches and eat apples and play in my shade and be happy."
"I am too big to climb and play," said the boy, "I want to buy things and have fun. I want some money. Can you give me some money?"
"I am sorry," said the tree, "but I have no money. I have only leaves and apples. Take my apples Boy, and sell them. Then you’ll have money and you’ll be happy."

And so the boy climbed up the tree and gathered the apples and carried them away.

And the tree was happy.

But the boy stayed away for a long time… and the tree was sad.
And then one day the boy came back and the tree shook with joy and she said, "Come, Boy, climb up my trunk and swing from my branches and be happy."

"I am too busy to climb trees," said the boy.
"I want a house to keep me warm," he said.
"I want a wife and I want children, so I need a house. Can you give me a house?"
"I have no house," said the tree, "The forest is my house, but you may cut off my branches and build a house. Then you will be happy."

And so the boy cut off all her branches and carried them away to build his house.

And the tree was happy.

But the boy stayed away for a long time, and when he came back the tree was so happy she could hardly speak. "Come, Boy," she whispered, "Come and play."

"I am too old and sad to play," said the boy, "I want a boat that will take me far away from here. Can you give me a boat?"

"Cut down my trunk and make a boat," said the tree. "Then you can sail away and be happy."

And so the boy cut down her trunk and made a boat and sailed away.

And the tree was happy…
…but not really.

And after a long time, the boy came back again.
"I’m sorry Boy," said the tree, "But I have nothing left to give you. My apples are gone."

"My teeth are too weak for apples," said the boy.

"And my branches are gone," said the tree, "So you can’t swing on them."

"I’m too old to swing on branches," said the boy.

"My trunk is gone," said the tree, "So you can’t climb."

"I’m too tired to climb," said the boy.

"I’m sorry," said the tree, "I wish that I can give you something but I have nothing left. I’m just an old stump."

"I don’t need very much," said the boy, "Just a quiet place to sit and rest. I’m very tired."

"Well," said the tree, straigthening her up as much as she can, "An old stump is good for sitting and resting. Come, Boy. Sit down and rest."

And the boy did.

And the tree was happy.